How to Set Goals – The Dreambreaker Method Goal setting done right

I have always been a dreamer. Still am. I just know how to hide it better now, but I still dream seemingly impossible, idealistic, utopian dreams. And it makes sense to generally stay quite about my dreams till they are broken down.

I sometimes pretend to be the dream breaker. Someone who rushes in, grabs each and every dream that I have been nurturing, and then break. it. down.

Break it down into a plan.

Dreams deserve plans. I call it dream breaking. Here’s how it is done.

How to Break Dreams into Goals

Goal setting - Dreambreaker method

You can’t hit a target if you do not know what it is. We need to define our targets.

I have had some very embarrassing failures (the failed scholar of self, remember?) in achieving my goals and those failures have helped me learn.

The following points can prove to be helpful in setting goals/targets.

1. Setting goals is not a one-time 30 minute activity.

It is an exercise in thinking actually. And thinking, believe it or not, is hard. I have this little test, “if you find thinking to be easy, you are either doing it wrong or not doing enough of it.”

Making goals require you to think back and then think forward, with you and your precious little dreams in the middle. It is a one heck of a ride, I assure you (I am in the process of setting goals as I write this, so I can vouch for the sheer difficulty of honestly assessing my past to adjust my present).

2. The goals that you write down are to be regularly reviewed.

There must be a system for review. To control something you need to track it. I think one should review their primary goals at least once every quarter (3 months). You can even review daily, depending on your goals.

Also, to review you need to record. You can use any medium to record. I wasted a lot of time trying to adapt different technologies. Now I use paper and pen, I doodle, draw, make venn diagrams and just brainstorm the heck out of my dreams.

3. Pay attention to the language you use.

We tend to be careless with the kind of language we use with ourselves. Refer back to the fact that the most powerful story ever told is the one you tell yourself, about yourself.

Bottom line: the language you use to write down your goals is important.

Tony Robbins goes to great lengths in explaining why you should use the following method to formulate your desired outcomes:

  • Use positive language instead of negation. Write “eat healthy foods” instead of “Don’t eat junk food”.
  • Be as specific as possible. Pretty self-explanatory. Your goal is to, for example, earn more money? Specify how much. From which business. Perhaps break the targeted income to per month? Per week maybe? Per day? And of course, the deadline of achieving the goal? You get the picture.
  • Have a clear idea of what success will look like. Tony Robbins calls this “evidence procedure”. What will you see when you achieve your goal? How will you feel? What will you hear? Any tastes you can associate with your goal’s success? As many senses that you can involve, the better.
  • The goals should not be dependent on others. Will your goal only work if someone somewhere has to to do a certain thing? Are you in control of your goals? You should be able to answer it in “Yes I am”.
  • The outcome of your goals should be contributing to someone or something other than you. Adjust your goals so they have a “contribution” factor. Some goals may seem harder to adjust. For example, you want to lose weight. That’s for yourself only, you think. No. When you will lose weight, your loved ones will notice and they will be happy for you. Involve your surroundings and your communities in your goals in a positive way.

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WHAT THE HELL this is Not Easy!

If you’ve read this far, you at least have that patience thing going for you; congratulations.

But in all honesty, this is difficult work.

They say that there are only two types of pains in this world, the pain of regret and the pain of discipline. Always, always choose the pain of discipline. This is my pain of discipline.

Just remember, once you reach a place where it feels boring and difficult, that is the place you need to cross.

Question: Do you set goals? Any tips you’d like to add to this? Let me know in the comments section. Thanks.

I am already SUPER FREAKIN EXCITED about what I am putting down on paper, setting goals and reviewing the last year. I wish the same excitement for you in trying to live the life of your dreams.

The next post (expected coming Thursday), I will share some of those goals, complete with templates that you can use to start your own Dream Breaking. God willing.

Now I am off to enjoying the Lahori winters. God bless and best of luck in your conquests and adventures.

Note: Register for the The SECOND Annual LifeETC Meetup here.

Photo courtesy of Corsini

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6 Comments

  1. Excellent Post. Goal setting is challenging because it requires one to be absolutely objective, specific and realistic about ones desired outcomes, resources and beliefs. But like anything in life, one can not be good at goal-setting unless the process of setting goals is practiced over and over again until it becomes more than just a skill and does not require an effort at the conscious level. That is to say that it becomes secondary nature. The “evidence procedure” reminds me of the time when I was preparing for my final exams and I was losing my motivation because I did not feel fully prepared. I sat down and imagined myself at my graduation ceremony and felt the joy all around me – especially those of my parents, relatives and friends. The sight and sounds that imagined and felt boosted my confidence. With Allah’s grace and my parents prayers I passed the exams. Had I backed out at that low point, it could have been a different story today. So this technique can be very powerful when used methodically.

    Btw, I would really like to participate in the meetup. However, I am trying to put together enough justifications in my own mind to fly over from Jeddah to attend….

    • Thank you so much for the input, Avais. Loved your thoughts. Our mind is a powerful tool — use it proper and the possibilities are endless!

      And reason to fly? For the cupcakes of course! 🙂 I would really love for you to come.

  2. Muzaffar Ali

    Ah! you remind me of my weight loss goals that i set long ago on word document and i achieved too, i set like after week my weight should be x and then after 2 week it should be y and made like 9 months plan and it worked and i lost from 94kg to 76kg, but now i am again at 85kg 🙁 and going to plan for next year to lose weight, yes its very hard to achieve goals, i like this statement of pain. Best of luck for your goals, hope to meet at meetup.
    Regards
    Muzaffar Ali

  3. Nice post. I made goals while setting up the dairy farm and it helped alot. after reading this I have to revise all my previous forgotten goals :P. looking forward to the next post. stay awesome bhae 😀

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